Simple etiquette in a lunch interview

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Dear Joan:
In several weeks, I have an interview. Hardly something you haven’t dealt with in your column before. But there is a new twist, at least for me. It will be conducted over lunch.

It is making me more nervous than need be, because I keep imagining they will disqualify me automatically if I use the wrong fork. I once heard a story that Henry Ford selected one executive candidate over another because the one chosen tasted his food before he salted it, whereas the other candidate was eliminated because of his indiscriminate salting.

Then there's the business of the bill. Should I offer to pay? What is the best way to phrase that request? Am I then required to pay for all persons who might be participating? Help!

Answer:
You're giving yourself needless indigestion. If you focus on the appetizers instead of the "main course" you're going to blow it before you start. Save your appetite for the meatier issue - what you have to say about your prior work experience and qualifications.

Spend your preparation time cooking up short and sweet mini-stories that illustrate your past accomplishments. Keeping your answers concise will give you a chance to eat. Being prepared will give you one less thing to worry about.

Don't get overly anxious about etiquette. Employers are more interested in what you say than how you eat, unless you do something that clearly breaks the rules such as sneezing on the food, being rude to the waiter or dunking your sandwich in your soup. If you follow the commonly understood rules, you will do just fine (elbows off the table, chew with your mouth closed, don’t talk with a mouthful, etc.).

The only time you will need to study the etiquette books is when you are applying for a job in which elegant dining with important clients is the norm; then the correct fork does matter. Here are a few things to consider beforehand so you can dig into the bigger issue-making a great impression:

·        If you know where you will be eating, stop in ahead of time and look at the menu.

·        Choose something small. Since most of your time will be spent talking, your interviewer will probably finish before you do.

·        Don't choose something that requires a lot of chewing.

·        Don't order anything that is prepared tableside

·        Avoid things that splatter such as soup, tacos, spaghetti.

·        Choose something that doesn't give you a fight. For example, don’t order shrimp in the shell.

·        Choose juice over salad or soup. It will give you more time to talk and isn't messy.

·        Look at your interviewer not at your food.

·        Use your napkin often. It will be hard to take you seriously if you have mayonnaise on your chin.

·        Skip dessert.

·        If your interviewer eats there regularly, ask for a recommendation to get a flavor for what he or she might be ordering.

·        Don't complain about the food or discuss your food preferences.

·        Don't drink alcohol, even if everyone orders it but you.

·        If the worst happens, and your lunch slides into your lap, stay poised and in good humor and get back to business quickly.

Now, about the check. If you have been invited for the interview, your interviewer will pick up the tab. If you initiated the lunch and have requested an informational interview, it is your responsibility to pay for your guest(s).

If the restaurant is cafeteria style, pace yourself so that you are ready to go to the cashier at the same time as your interviewer. Let him or her get in line first so the transaction can be handled smoothly.

Go get that job and bon appetit!